Dear Middle Mom,

You know who you are. The mom who has both teenagers AND elementary-aged kids at home. The mom who feels like she practically lives in her car, shuttling kids to sports practice, music lessons, tutoring, work, friends’ houses, after-school activities, and everything else in between.

The mom who used to love looking forward to getting all the kids in bed so she could finally have some time for herself, but now that precious time is often taken over by teens who can’t seem to turn off their brains before 10 PM (or sometimes even later).

The mom who used to get to know other moms around her by attending "playdates" with her toddlers, but now finds herself feeling strangely lonely in a sea of older kids and more complex schedules.

The mom who once stressed over sleep schedules and milestone achievements, but now stresses over whether her teens and younger kids are becoming the capable, kind, independent people she hopes they'll grow up to be.

The mom who used to lose sleep because her babies wouldn’t sleep, but now lies awake worrying about the world her teens are growing up in and the things they’re exposed to—things she can’t control or shield them from anymore.

The mom who once had all the answers when it came to parenting (or at least she thought), but now often finds herself second-guessing her choices, feeling like she has less control over the decisions her teens make, and wondering if she’s doing enough.

This is a tough season, no doubt. You’re stuck between two worlds—still in the trenches with younger kids who need your care and attention, but also navigating the emotional and mental labyrinth that comes with raising teens.

When they were little, you could talk with others about things they were struggling with more openly. But with teens, you have to consider and value their privacy, which makes talking with other moms about the hard stuff next to impossible.

I'm not here to tell you it will get better. Nor am I here to give you advice on how to deal with it all.

I'm just here to tell you this:

You’re managing more than anyone realizes, often in silence. It can be a very heavy and lonely time.

But here’s the thing: you’re doing it. You’re getting through the chaos and uncertainty, even when it feels like you’re running on empty. And even if you don’t feel like it, you’re giving your kids exactly what they need—your love, your guidance, and your presence, even when it doesn’t always look the way you imagined.

You are the mom your kids need.

Know that even thought it often feels like it, you’re not alone in this juggling-act stage of motherhood. In fact, there are a whole bunch of us just trying to figure out when we last had a full night’s sleep, while also pretending like we know what we’re doing. (Spoiler: we don’t, but we’re making it work anyway.)

Keep going. You’ve got this, even on the days when it feels like you don’t.

With empathy and humor always,

Hilary